The Traveller

It's all about resting
and waiting
and feeling safe
Tucked up against the cold
Sheltered from the sun
Shielded from the storm
Cocooned against the raging winds
on the desolate moor

The weary traveller
urged to pause
Nothing to be gained
No victory to be won
from battling on
Whilst a refuge lies ahead
Inviting; warm
A quiet place to rest awhile

Take some food; drink
Here: sit beside the fire
Sleep
Be refreshed
Restored
Before you take up
your journey once again

Autumn Sun

Oh to be bathed in the warmth
In the light
Your son in the sun
Radiance spilled down
to touch my uplifted soul
It restores
You restore
bring hope.

Hands

Shoulders taut
Arms tensed
Fists balled
Jaw clenched
Holding the pain
the sadness
loss
yearning
anger
resentment
guilt and shame
All clutched tight
But you ask me to let go
Offer to pour water
to soothe
a healing balm
to ease
But it's been so long
that the joints are locked

I feel your warmth
relaxing my muscles
telling me you're here
That it'll be alright
And slowly I start to unfurl
Imperceptibly at first
But I acknowledge your work
And let you go further
A little more each day
As you gently take
my deformed and knotted hands in your own
I feel a physical ache
from keeping them this way
And as you gently prise
each finger open
it hurts
stiff; unused
unused to being used this way
But I can see your desire
To free me
relieve me
And I let you slip your hand
into my open palm
And be with me
Not moving; not going
Just being.

Healing

Dare I ask for it?
Dare I pray for it?
Dare I even dream of it?
For I know that you can
But what if you don't?
What if you won't?
Is my faith too small?

Stillness and Silence

Stillness is an art
which I have not yet mastered
Even in the world of sleep
I toss and turn
fidget and fret
But I yearn for it;
that ability to sit unmoving
Inert for a time
To welcome rest;
rest from movement
rest from my mind
Content to pause
and not to plan the moment
at which I can throw the pebble
into the calm water
and rush off again

Silence is a gift
which I have yet to unwrap
Now and then
I tentatively pull
at the coloured ribbons
Tantalised
Mesmerised by the possibilities inside
But reluctant to open it
in case reality cannot live up
to expectation
Or maybe I am afraid
of what I might hear in the nothingness
Or worse
that I hear nothing
So I sit awhile
admiring my present

Waves

I am overwhelmed
by the sense that
I'm falling apart
Gradually disintegrating
Eroding away
Piece by piece
Dissolving into nothingness

Daily I must remind myself
that this is a lie
I am chosen
by the one on high
And He will not let me fall
However low I seem to go

So I cling to this truth
like a drowing man
Unwilling to concede
to the raging waves
Choking; coughing
But intent on survival
Hungry for life

My only fear
that one day I will discover
that I have been flailing
in a shallow puddle

The Trap

Am I failing?
Could do better: C minus
Not faithful enough
Not strong enough
Not enough
Weak
And I am tempted to end
my poem right here
because sometimes
that is all I feel
But...
There it is again: but
I cannot leave it there
For however faint it seems
There is hope
I have a hope
You are faithful
You are strong
You are enough
But I am still learning
how to let go
and let you.
So that your truth
your promises
might be realised
Experienced
Touched and enjoyed
And I often don't get it
And so I start again
Am I failing?
Could do better: C minus

Lost

Who am I?
Where am I?
And how do I find me?
Fumbling
Searching
Subsumed
Absorbed

And I think I've forgotten
even how to look
or where to go
I'm not even sure
I don't even know
If I'd recognise me
in that glass on the wall
And is it terrible to admit
that I have only just
discovered this?
And that there is part of me
that just shrugs
Are you really so important?
You can't have been that special.
And yet
And yet...
In my deepest part
I know beyond doubt
that it matters
That I matter
That I am special
And so I will seek
and search
for me
And I will not give up
And I will not let go