One Day

One day in heaven
I will sing effortless harmonies
like refracted light
One day in heaven
I will paint extravagant brushstrokes
declaring the glory of your creation
One day in heaven
I will find words to express my love
without uttering a sound
One day

Until then
I will offer the little I have
The fraction of the creative me
you created me to be
But I will not be frustrated by my lack
Just thankful for your gifts
which I shall try to use
However imperfect, uncertain
to praise your name
today

In the garden

I strugggle, I think, to see you
Until I step into your world
Into the winter-clad garden I venture
And there you are
In the early bulb shoots
pushing through the frost-bitten earth
In the call of the birds
in the bare, barren trees
In the green - just a word for a thousand hues
Pearlescent, suffused in sunlight
The vibrant red of berries on a leafless branch
In each and every one I see you
Your beauty and your majesty
so easy to miss
To rush unseeing by
But when I pause
You are all around
Thank you for giving me eyes
to see you this way
When the dark crevices of my mind
present endless distractions
Your beauty is true
Your light prevails
And you draw me back to you

Storm-tossed and Weary

To be found in a tempest
that is only for me
To be caught in a storm
that no one else can see
Deserted in the wilderness
when there are people all around
Screaming and crying
though none can hear a sound
How long, Lord, I shout?
Won't you please let me out?

Oh I know that you're there
and that you constantly love me
And I don't really think
that this is all the life you give me
I hear you; I see you
I know that you are there
You touch me, embrace me
In my suffering you share

But I shout and rage
Nonetheless

On retreat

Today is a spacious place
Today is peaceful
Slower of pace
Today there is time to sit and be
Today there is room to be me

A chance to get to know You better
A brother; a friend
Not some distant being
A father; a mother
Not some amorphous other

You are my beloved
And I am yours

Today is a spacious place

He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me (Psalm 18)
You have not given me into the hands of the enemy but have set my feet in a spacious place (Psalm 31)
When hard pressed, I cried to the Lord; he brought me into a spacious place (Psalm 118)

Hidden Gem

Is this a stripping away?
Is this a laying bare?
Rugged oak chiselled and planed
to reveal an intricate design
Is this the reconstruction
of the house that is me
that I thought was alright?
Are you mining to find the diamond?
However rough it may be
That I may become a jewel
A jewel in your crown?

Freedom

Who will be the dreamer of my dreams?
For it is not I. Not now, not here
And who will sing my song?
When there are no words to bring
No sound to be made
Who will write my story?
With no paper to be found
And the ink run dry
Who will paint my picture?
When I am colourless; invisible
And there's nothing left to see?
And who will dance my rhythm?
When I am shackled, held in chains

But from the deths of my soul I cry
That I was surely made to fly
To soar; on high
To dream and to sing
To write and to paint
To dance my own dance
Set me free
So I can be me